Journal

Every Day the Same

Posted on Dec 17, 2012 in Journal | 0 comments

It's after 10:00 pm... I'm in bed.  Hiro Puppy is in his little bed in my bed.  Tony's in another bedroom sleeping.   Mama is walking around whining and moaning some downstairs.  In a little while I'll go downstairs and put her back in bed.  I gave her an extra half of her anxiety medicine just before getting her into bed.  Need to take her to her doctor sometime soon... to discuss her general condition and the fact that the anxiety pills aren't working all that great... at least some of the time.  I can give it to her and three hours later she is still whining and moaning... it drives Tony crazy and eventually pushes me to the breaking point.  It's the same every day, every night. Read More

The New Hobbit Movie and Other Stuff

Posted on Dec 12, 2012 in Journal | 0 comments

I was at the book store the other day and saw lots of Hobbit books and display... along with little stuffed characters from a new Hobbit movie that premieres the middle of December.  I immediately thought of Matthew... he loved the first Hobbit movie.  He used to go with his friends to the very first showing at midnight of special movies.... Continued on Wed night, Dec 12... I think.  To be honest all the days run together.  I can't keep up with the dates... the only day of the month that I'm aware of is the 17th.... the day in March that Matthew died.   Matthew died.... it's like a punch to the stomach... a shock to my brain,  my heart sinks, and I cry. Read More

Pioneer Square

Posted on Nov 29, 2012 in Journal | 0 comments

Today I got my "mama sitter"... and I met up with Bill and we went to Pioneer Square... the oldest part of Seattle.... there are lots of art galleries there.  So we were gonna explore some of them. I had a great time... glad I didn't talk myself out of going yesterday. We visited several galleries including: 1000 Museums... they print qualities of some of the most famous pictures from galleries around the world.  Talked about copyright issues and such... interesting.  Saw a picture I liked of lots of houses with snow piled high on the roofs.  You had to look to see the houses... pretty neat I thought. Next we visited Art Wolfe's gallery... I met Libby, whom I've heard about from Bill.  I saw the very artsy table Bill made for his studio.  I have to say I was inspired to do photography after seeing some of Art's amazing work.  Got to hear about the  inner workings of how some of his pictures came together... I especially liked a beautiful print of rice paddies in China.  It was taken from a hill above the rice paddies... the light was beautiful... and the picture was almost abstract like.  Just gorgeous! Read More

It’s Been a Long Time

Posted on Nov 29, 2012 in Journal | 0 comments

I remember writing the last post about the movie Caterpillar.  It seems like ages ago.  My whole world has been shattered... there is an emptiness and my heart aches.  Matthew passed away... he died on March 17 2012.... some eight months ago. Tony said last night that he thinks I've done exceptionally well... but that I am extra fragile.  Some days are good... some days I feel totally lost and paralyzed.... most days I put forth effort and make it through. I try to remember what Susan told me.... "heart follows hands".... just do even if you don't feel like it and eventually the joy will come around.  It works mostly. Read More